Unfortunately the idea of an Imaginary Book Review page is better than the reviews themselves IMHO.

In the spirit of Borges' remark, write a book review of an imaginary book. (Between 500-1000 words.) The book may be from any time period, it may be fiction or non-fiction, and its author may be either an invention or an actual writer.

!SR

Another year another blog

Hungover?

Not too bad thanks.

Hogmanay started well with the arrival from Amazon of the DVD "Shaun of the Dead", my philosophy being that if I should get at least one Christmas present that I want each year then I'm better off ordering it myself.

Didn't have time to watch it though (did that today (it's ace!)), a wash and shave then off to gym, then to Safeways - now Morrisons - for beer for later. I met a couple of folk on the street that I hadn't seen for months.

My folks traditionally have me round for the last meal of the year. It was great, then played my little brother at Pro Evolution Soccer 4. Even though I'm not very good I managed to beat him in the last game, which leaves me undefeated going into 2005! We then headed down to Weatherspoons where we met up with our respective mates. (Does everyone everywhere call it Spoons?). A couple of pints, then home to get changed for Pipe Band. I managed to find time to make a vodka - coke mixture for carrying round with me, then met up with the band.

I was glad it was quite a mild night - last years event was called off because of extreme weather. The street party went well - had a really good time, met loads of folk. I hung around watching one of the other 'proper' bands play for a while. I came back up the road to get changed out of my Pipe Band outfit, but having done so couldn't really be arsed going out again. I suppose I was slightly downbeat after kissing girls wishing them a Happy New Year and watching them disappear up the road. Nowhere was open, but I could have gone round to one of my mates. Time to rewind the video for "It's Only an Excuse" and crash out on the couch.


!SR

Happy Hogmanay! This is Edinburgh, of course, the fireworks up north are a lot better ! *cough*.
!SR

Foreword to reviewed films

I quite often like having a little peek at the Four Word Film Review Site to alleviate the boredom of reading much lengthier reviews. http://www.fwfr.com/

I seem to remember a similar site regarding books and will look it up for a future blog.

In the meantime these quotes:

Truth! Justice! Weight Watchers?

Elastic wife. Secret life

Bird, plane- Pixar!

give you some idea. They are from reviews of the new Pixar film the Incredibles.


!SR

Rugby is game played by men with oddly shaped ..

When I was studying in Ireland, I took up rugby. As my first season wore on, the boys and I were eventually scheduled to play a team that had a reputation for violent play. Considering that we weren't the most talented outfit to have ever taken the field, we took on the challenge with a "do or die" attitude, hoping things would swing our way. They didn't, and to make matters worse, our star player, Alan, dislocated his hip after a ferocious tackle. We all stood back to watch the medic who, in one swift movement, popped the hip back into its socket. Then Alan let out a blood-curdling scream. To our horror, we realized that one of his testicles had been jammed into the socket, and was now firmly held in place by the hip. Incidentally, Alan ripped a vocal cord with his screaming.
P. Oulet, Roanoke, VA

from http://www.fhmus.com/reporter/truestory/

OMIGOD that's gotta hurt.


!SR

Listening Post

Top Five Toons 4 2day:

1. Os Mutantes - Panis Et Circenses

2. Belle and Sebastian - Step Into My Office Baby

3. Talvin Singh - OK

4. RL Burnside feat Lyrics Born - Someday Baby

5. Brian Eno - Music for Airports


!SR

Slacker backer

Saw a documentary abour Richard Linklater on Channel 4 this week. It reminded me of how much I like the film "Slacker".

I first saw it about a decade ago, given a copy by one of my art college friends.

I marvelled as I watched the strange structure unfold, and the great characters and weird stories.

http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/B0002DB4ZK/102-3853251-3590511?v=glance

For a list of other slacker movies try

http://www.geocities.com/Hollywood/Set/7601/list.html




!SR
(" I should have stayed at the bus station! ")

Linked from http://exclamationmark.typepad.com/blog/

to Atlas Comics 12 Dumbest Comic Book Covers at

http://web2.chicagonet.net/~atlas/cover3.htm

!SR

Professional Fossil Dealers Web Ring

http://www.fossildealers.com/webring.html

Umm, yes .. really!

!SR

Good Luck, Mr. Gorsky

I haven't heard thisone for a while, but it bears re-printing:

It seems when Apollo Mission Astronaut, Neil Armstrong first walked on the moon, he not only gave his famous "One Small Step for [a] Man, One Giant Leap for Mankind" statement, but followed it by several remarks - -- usual comm traffic between him, the other astronauts and Mission Control.

Before he reentered the lander, he made the enigmatic remark "Good Luck, Mr. Gorsky". Many people at NASA thought it was a casual remark concerning some rival Soviet Cosmonaut; however, upon checking, they discovered no Gorsky in either the Russian or American Space Programs.

Over the years many people have questioned him as to what the "Good Luck, Mr. Gorsky" statement meant. A few months ago, (July 05, Tampa Bay, FL) during a Q&A session following a speech, a reporter brought up the 26 year old question to Armstrong. He finally responded.

It seems that Mr. Gorsky had finally died and so Neil Armstrong felt he could answer the question.

When he was a kid, he was playing baseball with his brother in the backyard. His brother hit a fly ball which landed in front of his neighbor's bedroom window. His neighbors were Mr. & Mrs. Gorsky. As he leaned down to pick up the ball he heard Mrs. Gorsky shouting at Mr. Gorsky: "Oral sex, oral sex you want? You'll get oral sex when the kid next door walks on the moon!!"

http://www.niksula.cs.hut.fi/~walther/fun/stories.html

This is one of those modern day myths, check out the Apollo 11 Journal at

http://www.hq.nasa.gov/alsj/a11/a11.step.html

but then what the hell do they know? ;)

!SR

Mosaic Lizard at Guell Park copied from aviewoncities.com
!SR

The long goodbye

<>

!SR

Caetano Veloso (London London)
!SR

Avoiding death by Megadeath

September 25, 1983, is a date that could have been burned into the history books forever. On that day, against overwhelming odds, a Soviet military officer averted a worldwide nuclear war. What almost happened would have dwarfed into near obscurity any wars or terrorist attacks or natural disasters in memory.

http://www.prweb.com/releases/2003/9/prweb81112.php

!SR

Toilet humour

Restaurant
Houston, Texas USA 77025
Men's restroom, 1^st floor

On the floor:

look to the right!

To the right:

look to the left!

to the left:

look up!

On the celing:

damn your an idiot!!

From http://www.thewritingsonthestall.com/men/

Some days you get the feeling you've forgotten something...
!SR

Mmmmm.. Michelle Hicks
!SR

Watching me watching you

The Mirror Project is a growing community of like-minded individuals who have photographed themselves in all manner of reflective surfaces.

http://www.mirrorproject.com/


!SR

It was a textual relationship (1)

After she left we kept in touch mainly by text messaging, e-mail, and one phone call. But mainly text messaging. She gave me such a laugh, and I hope her too. One Sunday we texted each other odd Country and Western Song titles, e.g. "I've put my beer in the boot of my car and I'm driving myself to drink", "I missed you... but my aim is getting better", etc, etc. She was into Alt-Country so she had a better range of songs to draw on.

I enjoyed getting text messages while at work too. I stick music on my PC. One day I texted her that I was listening to Perry Farrell cover the Doors track "Children of the Night" when I got a text from her. She was into the Doors (and would quite happily have been a groupie for the cover band I think). She texted me back saying that she was humming a Janes Addiction track when she was typing the text. Shit like that happens around me the whole time. When I meet someone else that's on the same wavelength I really dig it.

A lassie at work heard my mobile phone go. She said that I probably liked a "textual relationship" because I didn't have to deal with people in "real" life. Looking back, maybe she was right.


!SR

I have just finished reading Asbury's "Gangs of New York". Having watched the film some time ago, I was pleasantly surprised to find that the book bore no relation to the film.

I was slightly skeptical about some of the content in the book, and that he would describe every gang as being the most evilest, worst gang, ever, ever to walk the streets of New York, which got a little tiring as the book went on. Also some of the stories about the criminals were taken from the police officers or criminals own recollections about what happened, and this always leads to "hyping up" or distortion of events.

Because I didn't take on board all that Asbury wrote, it kind of felt like the book was somewhere in the middle of a work of fiction and fact. But it was still a damn good read.

Politcal corruption, murder, thievery, prostitution, drugs, - some things are indeed timeless.

Oh - and gangs - lots of gangs!


!SR